Why deny it, as parents we want everything to turn out great for our offspring, to do great, to be well. The more the merrier! But that this happens full time, beyond an expectation, is a real illusion. And it is not a bad thing, in fact, parents must let our children make mistakes because through mistakes they will receive a whole life lesson.
In life, if we already know it as adults, the days do not necessarily go as we want or as we plan, nor are we always in a rosy state.
Therefore, although we want to avoid many obstacles for our children and make life easier for them, it is convenient that, according to their age and in matters that do not put their safety at risk, let them make mistakes and face the natural consequences of their mistakes.
Why is it a good idea to do it? There are many reasons and there are several benefits and cognitive and emotional learning. Here is a list of them:
- Emotions are awakened in them
By making mistakes, children get in touch with emotions such as frustration, sadness or anxiety, which are not always easy to handle, but are also a part of life. By experiencing them, children work on their tolerance for discomfort.
- They learn that being wrong does not make them victims of injustice
Life is full of bumps and things don't always work out, and that's not necessarily someone else's fault. If they lose a soccer game, for example, we can help them see the reasons behind it: the opposing team was more focused, was better trained, made better use of their scoring opportunities, or had a better strategy.
- They understand that nobody is perfect
If children discover that making mistakes is okay, that it happens to all of us, they can aspire to perform well, to be a better version of themselves, which is very different from wanting to be perfect or believing that they can be the best at everything.
- They gain confidence in themselves
By not basing their personal worth on being perfect, difficult situations and mistakes allow children to work on their own self-control and even learn to apologize.
- They cultivate their own responsibility
How are they going to learn to do things, to take care of their school or homework if we correct all their mistakes or anticipate them, check their backpack, solve all their domestic needs and remind them of everything that is their responsibility to do? in every moment? In the short term, it may make life easier for us and get out without time, but in the long run, children are not aware of the consequences of not paying attention, of their omissions and of what corresponds to them .
- They become more persistent
Like anyone, when something doesn't come off the first time, a child may want to throw in the towel, but try again as many times as necessary to achieve a certain goal. Putting together a puzzle with many pieces or learning a choreography, for example, is a way of working on perseverance. The best reward? Achieve it by trying on your own.
- They develop their own wisdom
Letting them make their own decisions and face the natural consequences of these will help them to think a little more about their next elections, especially if things did not turn out as they thought before. That they are wrong in everything they can while they are in our care, finally going out with one shoe of one and another of another will not be something that affects their life in a definitive way.
- Reduce your resistance to following our instructions
When a child has enough space to make some decisions and assume what happens, positive or negative, they can put up less resistance to what we ask them to do or the instructions we give them and for which there is no turning of the page.
As parents, we can also contribute to seeing the positive in mistakes if we share with them situations, both at home, at work or in the family, in which we have made mistakes.
It is also good to explain how we have felt (it is a way of empathizing with them and that they see that they are not the only ones who feel sad), how we have solved them and what we have learned from them.
Making mistakes entails learning in itself, and they say that practice makes perfect and it is true ... A child can become very good at something that he likes or is interested in thanks to the mistakes he makes along the way, such as knowing what he does NOT have to do to obtain a certain result.
Finally, it is about giving them tools to face the world in the best possible way, with its sadness and its joys.
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