The childhood of our children only happens once, each moment of their life is unique and unrepeatable. Every laugh, every hug, kiss, every meal, story, game or any moment shared with them is a mark that remains in their life.
If we kept that always in mind, maybe we could be better parents to them. And parents who do not measure their words towards their children would think twice or more before saying something to them, especially in times of anger, anger, disgust or tiredness. Let us not label our children with such rude words as: 'You are stupid', 'bad', 'stupid', 'clumsy', 'coward', etc. Remember that verbal abuse is also violence to children.
When you take your child to the park, the beach, the pool, restaurants or some other public place, you usually learn a lot from other parents, good or bad. One of the things that most attracts my attention is what some parents say to their children when their actions do not correspond to what the parents expect. There are phrases that it would be better to avoid, more than anything so that they do not affect the self-esteem of the little ones:
1- ‘You are unbearable’. 'You are a bore'. "You only give me annoyance." The child may take this opinion of his parents as his own and may feel that he does not bring anything good in the life of his parents and that it is only a problem in their lives.
2- ‘Don't cry’. 'You're a crybaby'. If the child cries it will be because of something and not because he is a crybaby. Do not repress the emotions of your children, the best thing is to listen to them and attend to them, so that he learns to express his feelings with words and not always with tears.
3- ‘You’ll see when I tell dad’, ‘If you don’t behave well ...’ Those phrases, in addition to representing a threat, leave one of the parents as a villain. It does not impose the respect of children towards their parents and it does impose a lot of fear of them.
4- 'You're a donkey', 'you're a fool', you never do anything right ',' Why aren't you like your sister '? There are children who have a harder time doing things than others, but that should not be a burden for them. Comparing children with other children, belittling, humiliating or insulting them, will take away the desire to do anything and lead to depression.
5- 'You are a liar', 'I don't trust you'. These phrases make children feel insecure and fearful. Children feel that they do not deserve the trust of their parents.
6- 'Leave me alone', 'Don't bother me', 'Stop nonsense', 'You are stupid' .. If you are busy, it is best to explain to your child that you will not finish what you are doing and that you will lend him attention.
Before saying anything to your children, even if you find yourself in a moment of rage, anger or disgust, it is best to take a deep breath, count to 10 or 100 if necessary, and then ask yourself if it is really necessary to say something to them at this time. Your words have a lot of power over your children, do not forget.
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